Yes! It's true!
Your girl ~*Kristie Lynn*~ has the cure, not only for World Hunger but also for Alcoholism!
How possibly could I, just one mere person on this earth, have solved 2 of Life's Eternal Questions?
It's simple really.
I read recently that the World's Obese and Overweight population has grown to over 1 Billion people...
While the Hungry and Malnourished has fallen to just 800 Million.
Do the Math.
What does that mean?
Finally, we can put a big check mark next to this severe problem.
The solution?
We start the first official Weight Balancing Program. Each Overweight and Obese individual is paired up with one who is Starving.
While Chunky is chowing down on a nice bucket of fried chicken, they will not be allowed to finish it. They must share half of it with the hungry man.
Half of every sandwich, Half of every Chip, Half of every Tic-Tac.
This works by redistributing Lardo's calories over to Stick-n-Bones.
Eventually, Chunky will lose weight, while Hungry Man gains Chunky's extra pounds.
It's Ingenious!
Problem Solved!
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As for Alcholism...
Just give it all to me. Then you can't drink anymore.
And you get entertainment by watching me get wasted.
Its a Win-Win-Win Scenario!
You're welcome.
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UPDATE: New Slogan for my Committee!!
SAVE AN ALCOHOLIC, DRINK THEIR BEER
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